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Quotes of the Day
| Date | Authors Included |
| October 15 | Lily Tomlin, Russell Baker, Jane Austen, Carl Becker |
| October 14 | Jonathan Winters, Henri-Frédéric Amiel, Frank Zappa, John Kenneth Galbraith |
| October 13 | Woody Allen, Evelle J. Younger, Rita Mae Brown, Mark Twain |
| October 12 | Ronald Reagan, George Carlin, Samuel Johnson, Clive Barnes |
| October 11 | Ralph Hodgson, Buck Henry, Yogi Berra, Maurice Maeterlinck |
| October 10 | Henry Kissinger, Wendell Johnson, H. L. Mencken, Richard Feynman |
| October 09 | Anonymous, Stanislaw J. Lec, Bertrand Russell, George Bernard Shaw |
| October 08 | Johnny Carson, Peter Stone, John Wayne, James Russell Lowell |
| October 07 | Will Rogers, Alfred Hitchcock, Steven Weinberg, Sir Richard Steele |
| October 06 | Groucho Marx, Lucille S. Harper, Sir Francis Bacon, Thomas Fuller |
| October 05 | Fred Allen, National Lampoon, Paul Valery, Robert McCloskey |
| October 04 | George Orwell, Herman Melville, Dan Quayle, Jackie Mason |
| October 03 | Japanese Proverb, Max Beerbohm, Booth Tarkington, Tom Hanks |
| October 02 | Mark Twain, Joey Bishop, Vladimir Nabokov, Evan Esar |
| October 01 | Woody Allen, Art Spander, Denis Diderot, Foster's Law |
| September 30 | Thomas H. Huxley, Georg Christoph Lichtenberg, Philip K. Dick, Elbert Hubbard |
| September 29 | Charles Kuralt, Ernest Haskins, Jerry Garcia, Oscar Levant |
| September 28 | Unknown, Russell Baker, Cary Grant, Ronald Reagan |
| September 27 | Wilson Mizner, Adrienne E. Gusoff, Oscar Wilde, Sir Arthur Eddington |
| September 26 | Ogden Nash, B. F. Skinner, Henry Kissinger, Rene Descartes |
| September 25 | Groucho Marx, Alan Kay, Mae West, Dorothy Parker |
| September 24 | Robert Heinlein, Bagdikian's Observation, Rita Rudner, Paul Valery |
| September 23 | George Carlin, Ambrose Bierce, Judge Gideon J. Tucker, George Bernard Shaw |
| September 22 | George Gallup, Albert Einstein, Bertolt Brecht, Elaine Gill |
| September 21 | Charles M. Schulz, Emo Phillips, John Kenneth Galbraith, Takayuki Ikkaku, Arisa Hosaka and Toshihiro Kawabata |
| September 20 | Jeannette Rankin, Peter Ustinov, Ellen DeGeneres, Jean-Paul Sartre |
| September 19 | Pancho Villa, Woody Allen, John Ciardi, Yogi Berra |
| September 18 | Arthur Honegger, Stephen Leacock, Abraham Lincoln, Jerry Seinfeld |
| September 17 | Galileo Galilei, Edgar Allan Poe, Katharine Whitehorn, Oscar Wilde |
| September 16 | Ogden Nash, Kilgore Trout, Georg Christoph Lichtenberg, Edward Young |
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