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Fran Lebowitz (1950 - )
US writer and humorist [more author details]

Showing quotations 1 to 18 of 18 total

All God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable.: Fran Lebowitz
Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying.: Fran Lebowitz
- More quotations on: [Children]
Food is an important part of a balanced diet.: Fran Lebowitz
- More quotations on: [Food]
Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine.: Fran Lebowitz
- More quotations on: [Drinking]
I must take issue with the term 'a mere child,' for it has been my invariable experience that the company of a mere child is infinitely preferable to that of a mere adult.: Fran Lebowitz
- More quotations on: [Children]
I never took hallucinogenic drugs because I never wanted my consciousness expanded one unnecessary iota.: Fran Lebowitz
- More quotations on: [Drugs]
I've done the calculation and your chances of winning the lottery are identical whether you play or not.: Fran Lebowitz
If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater, suggest that he wear a tail.: Fran Lebowitz
- More quotations on: [Pets] [Dogs]
In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.: Fran Lebowitz
Life is something that happens when you can't get to sleep.: Fran Lebowitz
- More quotations on: [Life] [Sleep]
My favorite animal is steak.: Fran Lebowitz
- More quotations on: [Food]
No animal should ever jump up on the dining-room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation.: Fran Lebowitz
- More quotations on: [Pets]
Special-interest publications should realize that if they are attracting enough advertising and readers to make a profit, the interest is not so special.: Fran Lebowitz
Success didn't spoil me, I've always been insufferable.: Fran Lebowitz
- More quotations on: [Success]
The opposite of talking isn't listening. The opposite of talking is waiting.: Fran Lebowitz
Your life story would not make a good book. Don't even try.: Fran Lebowitz
- More quotations on: [Writing]
Humility is no substitute for a good personality.: Fran Lebowitz, Metropolitan Life, 1978
- More quotations on: [Humility]
Remember that as a teenager you are at the last stage of your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.: Fran Lebowitz, Social Studies (1981)

- 17 Quotations in other collections
- Search for Fran Lebowitz at Amazon.com

Showing quotations 1 to 18 of 18 total

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