Quotes of the Day

Selected from Michael Moncur's Collection of Quotations - April 18, 2014
Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy.
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H. L. Mencken (1880 - 1956)  
I bought a cactus. A week later it died. And I got depressed, because I thought, Damn. I am less nurturing than a desert.
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Demetri Martin, New York Magazine, October 3, 2005  
A husband is like a fire, he goes out when unattended.
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Evan Esar (1899 - 1995)  
That's what college is for - getting as many bad decisions as possible out of the way before you're forced into the real world. I keep a checklist of 'em on the wall in my room.
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Jeph Jacques, Questionable Content, 01-04-07  
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Note: These quotes are randomly selected from my collection by an automatic routine once a day. If you want more quotes, try the Quotations by Author page to browse our entire collection, or try the Random Quotations Page, which chooses new quotes each time you load it.